According to a recent study conducted by the Naming Institute, women with the name Karen have a 115% chance of naming their son Kyle. In this extensive survey, 100 women named Karen were asked to give the names of their children. All participants had at least one offspring named Kyle. The most astounding report was... Continue Reading →
Tragedy struck a family in Bentonville, Arkansas last evening when an intense game of uno ended prematurely. 12-year-old Ricky Johnstone laid down a deathly draw-4 card on his Grandma. The coroner claims that the mixture of shock and betrayal in 86-year-old Betty Johnstone triggered a major heart attack. She was pronounced dead on-site. Read More:... Continue Reading →
A creationist by the name of Bobby Johnstone out of Florida claims the only proof we need that God created Earth and all the animals is the fact that T-Rex arms are so short which inhibit the ability to masturbate. “Obviously, masturbation is a sin. That’s why God made the biggest, baddest dinosaur in all... Continue Reading →
"You’re" mom might actually be gay after these new reports surfaced. According to the website Reading Republican, homosexuals have been utilizing the power of windmills to spray gay mist all across the United States and into the homes of millions of Americans. The history of the windmill dates back to the 4th century where it... Continue Reading →
Do you ever feel like Siri just isn’t enough? Well throw your worries away because Apple just announced a new Siri - you will now be able to talk to your best buddy from the FBI whenever you want! Whenever you feel like you don’t know if something is a crime or not or you... Continue Reading →
Woken News started a petition to get Shaggy to be in the new Mortal Kombat 11 last weekend and the internet confirmed the shared love for Shaggy! Leaked image of Shaggy DLC Thanks to some photos gathered by Dankest Memes ͡º ͜ʖ ͡º (Fb.com/DankestMemesNoice) our hopes increase with each day passing as these might be... Continue Reading →
Fun fact for your Monday: did you know that in Europe, “Bigfoot” is referred to as “Bigmeter”? You learn something new every day! It’s a long-standing debate: What’s better? The metric system or the imperial system. As of 2019, the United States of America is the only industrialized country in the world that uses the... Continue Reading →
Sorry for the spoiler fam but Shaggy is confirmed to be the hero (or villain) to remove Thanos from existence and turn this film upside down. Sign this petition to make Shaggy a DLC in the new Mortal Kombat 11. Actor playing Shaggy was essentially unconscious for the entire movie. It is no secret that... Continue Reading →
What’s more important? Keeping your grandparent or your cell phone alive? Teenager Tina Smith was quick to answer this question when she unplugged her grandpa’s life support so she could charge her iPhone™ while visiting him in the hospital last weekend. Tina was mindlessly scrolling through some sweet memes when a nurse rushed in and... Continue Reading →
Doggo's love their bones! But could we be confusing the lickos and tongue blips we know and love as their kisses for our bones potential at a heckin' good taste? Cynologist Karen Wilburn is an expert doge psychologist who seems to believe that our best friends have a more sinister agenda when they bath us... Continue Reading →
