Countries Are Closer Than We Think And You Can Walk To a Different Country In a Few Hours, Theory Suggests

Forget paying for air travel: A new theory argues that you can simply get off your ass and walk to pretty much any country you want in just a few hours.

The theory is centered around the idea that airline companies solely rely on people thinking that it takes a long time to get places. Because of this, airline companies have been paying off GPS companies to tell us that it would take over a month to walk across the United States. Instead of walking or even driving, most people will choose to fly.

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We talked to 43-year-old conspiracy theory expert Bert Bransh and he had this to say:

“Big Airline has been scamming us for years. They give everyone three pretzels and a sip of water and call it a ‘snack’. This theory completely checks out. It’s almost as convincing as the Gay Frog theory.”

Although the theory doesn’t provide any supporting evidence, it really makes a lot of sense if you don’t think about it too much.

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Hopefully people will stop letting airline companies take advantage of them and just start walking to wherever they need to go. Whether it’s a short stroll from Europe to Asia or a small walk from India to Australia, you can probably get there without a plane ticket. Just start walking, people.

Woken News is a satirical news website and our articles are strictly for entertainment purposes. Explore our “About” page for more information.

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