Teen joins Military to avoid his Uncle – so he reenlists to the same base to ‘be closer’ to nephew

There is nothing in the world like unconditional love from your family but is it possible to love TOO much and too hard? 

Former Marine, and uncle, Kevin Macafee (37) decided to ‘be closer’ to his young nephew Kyle Macafee (18) a 2018 Mendon High graduate from Rochester, NY to enlist again in the Marines after he caught wind of Kyles decision to join.

While not everyone is happy with the Uncle’s decision, immediate family are thrilled.

“What better role model to help learn the ropes”, said Brian Macafee, Kevin’s older brother. “Those two have such a close relationship anyway so it only makes the most sense that he has the benefit of family for senior military command.”

Kyle agreed to a sit down for a 1on1 interview with Woken News to explain his disappointment with his uncle’s decision to join. 

Kyle I want to thank you for sitting down to speak with me today. I understand that you don’t approve of your Uncle being at the same military base as you, is that right?

Yeah it’s…terrifying to be honest. The whole reason I joined in the first place was to avoid him.

Why is that?

..can this be off the record?

Absolutely *Gesturing to camera man to keep rolling*

*Sigh* Okay.  So, we have a..special relationship..like I’m not supposed to talk about or I’ll get in trouble. 

*Reaching in my bag* Would you say it’s umwanted physical attention?

Yes.

*Pulling out a G.I. Joe doll* Could you point on the doll where this happened?

G.I. No-No

*sweating profusely* Wow, okay-didn’t see that one coming..oh god oh fuck..you pointed to his pp, jeewizz!

Kevin hasn’t returned our request for an interview. We were told his house was raided where he was detained and ultimately taken to prison hours after our interview with Kyle.

SUBSCRIBE VIA EMAIL!

Enter your email address to subscribe to WNN and receive notifications of new satirical articles by email.

Leave a Reply

Up ↑